Credit card fraud is always a pain in the backside. But credit card fraud in SOUTH AFRICA really turns things up a few notches.
Let me give you a bit of a spoiler alert: if it happens to you, you’re pretty much the female lion.
Just in case you were wondering, the female is the one on the bottom.
Prologue- 4:15am
It finally happened. While I’ve done my best to combat the bad reputation South Africa has when it comes to crime, I’m sorry to say I was hit recently. I should point out, however, that what happened to me could happen to anybody anywhere. It was not at all violent, and it was more annoying than anything. Just to be clear, dealing with the BANK was more annoying than the actual crime itself. Here’s what happened:
A couple of weeks ago, I was checking my bank account for no other reason than in silent hope my balance had magically grown overnight. It hadn’t. In fact, quite the opposite happened. My credit card was almost completely drained, while the day before there were no charges on it whatsoever. Curious, I checked to see if I had finally sleep-bought several hundred of the glorious Nic Cage pillowcases or life-size Bigfoot statues I’ve been eyeing up.
It turns out it was nothing as cool as that. Instead, my card had been charged 9 times in less than 10 minutes for a series of transactions at Robert Wayne Footwear in the middle of the night. That didn’t seem right. I asked the internet where Robert Wayne Footwear is, and it’s apparently in the United States. Because I reside in South Africa and because I had used my card here just hours before it was used across the world from me, I thought this would be a simple process to correct. I once had a fraudulent charge on my credit card back in Canada, and all it took was one quick call to the bank to sort the problem out. Easy peasy.
Except I forgot for a moment that I live in South Africa, the land where efficiency goes to die.
Here’s how it went down:
Act I- 4:30am
I obviously needed to call the bank. So I called the bank and immediately got launched into an automated hell. A soulless voice asked me to enter my card number. No problem. Next Step.
“For verification purposes, please enter your South African ID number, followed by the hash key”
Crap. Not being a South African resident, I don’t have a South African ID number. Let’s just try pressing zero.
“The ID number you entered does not have the right number of digits. Please enter your South African ID number, followed by the hash key.”
You’re pretty persistent, aren’t you, you automated pain in the arse? OK, 0 doesn’t work. How about *?
“The ID number you entered does not have the right number of digits. Please enter your South African ID number, followed by the hash key.”
Son of a…
All right. Let’s try entering the number portion of my passport…
“The ID number you entered does not have the right number of digits. Please enter your South African ID number, followed by the hash key.”
Apparently, I’m the ONLY expat customer FNB has ever had, because they offered me no other way of moving past the robot gatekeeper.
Act II- 4:47am
OK, FNB. You almost outfoxed me. But I Googled “FNB credit card fraud” and found a different number. After a few minutes fighting with a different voice robot (who mercifully didn’t demand my South African ID), I got to talk to a real live human!
Human: “Thank you for calling the FNB fraud department. How can I help you?”
Me: “This one is pretty simple. You see, I was nailed with several charges overnight, all from the same store, and all within a couple minutes of each other. It’s clear this wasn’t me because I used my credit card in South Africa a few hours before. Also, just the very nature of the charges is bizarre. Could you please reverse them?”
H: “Before we proceed, for verification purposes, can you please tell me the last time you used your credit card, and what the amount was?”
M: “Yes. Luckily enough, I kept the receipt. Here’s the info you need.”
H: “I’m sorry, that information is incorrect.”
M: “Huh? I’m telling you, that was the last time I used my card. I know for a fact it was. And I’m looking at the receipt right now. The info IS correct.”
H: “We can’t move on until you give me the correct information.”
M: “Listen, I don’t know what to tell you. You’re the problem here. Your bank’s inferior technology missed the fraudulent charges, which any self-respecting bank anywhere else in the world would have caught instantly, and now your bank’s same technology is telling you that I’m lying about using my card yesterday. Why is this so difficult???”
OK, so maybe I was starting to lose it a little bit.
H: “That’s ok. We’ll carry on. OK, I see the charges you’re talking about. I’ll send you a form to fill in and send back to our fraud department. Hold the line. All right, you should have it now.”
M: “Cool. I’ve got it, just let me check…wait. What? I can’t fill in this document online? I have to print it, write on it, and scan it? Isn’t there an easier way to do this? Plus, it’s asking me to fill out a bunch of stuff I JUST told you about. And I also have to send in pictures of my destroyed card? You’re kidding me, right?”
H: “No, you must fill out the form.”
M: “…Fine. I’ll send it back. But in the meantime, I’m leaving for vacation in 2 days. I have a rental vehicle waiting for me. I NEED a new card before I go, otherwise, I can’t pick up the vehicle. Can you help me out with that?”
H: “I’ll have somebody contact you.”
Act III- 11:30am
Pro tip here, kids: when a customer service rep in South Africa says they will call back or have someone call you, it will happen exactly none of the time. I REALLY needed a new credit card, so I decided to call the bank again. I’ll skip all the ID nonsense and fast forward 30 minutes to when I was finally able to get somebody on the phone.
H: “Why do you need a credit card rushed to you?”
M: “Because I’m leaving in 2 days for vacation. I need a credit card to pick up my rental vehicle.”
H: “I don’t think that’s possible.”
M: “Is there anyone at FNB who might think it IS possible?”
H: “I’ll check.”
…5 minutes later…
H: “We can get the card to you tomorrow afternoon.”
M: “Really? That’s awesome!”
H: “You just need to send us a copy of your flight tickets.”
M: “Wait, what???”
H: “Your flight tickets. We need them.”
M: “Yes, I heard you. But WHY???”
H: “To prove you’re going on vacation and need the card rushed to you.”
M: “I’m not flying. I’m driving.”
H: “…”
M: “…”
H: “You just need to send me the flight tickets.”
M: “I….I literally just told you I’m not flying.”
H: “Please hold.”
…7 minutes later…
H: “We can send the card to you.”
M: “OK, great!”
H: “It will cost R450.”
M: “Are you kidding me???? You should have picked the fraud up right away, and didn’t. Then you made me jump through several hoops. And now you’re going to charge me?”
H: “Yes.”
“Thank you for calling FNB. How can we crap all over your entire day?”
Act IV- Later That Day
At this point, I was so frustrated I just told them to send me the paperwork to cancel my accounts. I had had enough. And of course, they wouldn’t do that. I was told I needed to talk to my private banker before anything could happen. But that was part of the problem- I have a private banker at FNB who is very rarely available and rarely replies to emails or phone calls. But fine.
She did end up calling me back about 45 minutes later- apparently screwing around with a client is fine, but having a client attempt to leave altogether actually gets their attention. She assured me everything would be taken care of, and that a courier would contact me the next day to deliver my card.
Phew. Ordeal over.
Except not, because this is South Africa.
Act V- the Next Day
Me: “Hello?”
Courier, on the other end of the phone: “Hello Mr Maloney. I’m calling to arrange delivery of your card on Monday.”
M: “Monday? I was promised it would be delivered today. I won’t be around on Monday. I leave tomorrow morning at 6am.”
C: “It’s impossible. Who told you that?”
M: “The bank. Please figure this out.”
Act VI- 10 Minutes Later
C: “Ok, we’re coming today.”
M: “Perfect! Thank you so much. My sister in law will be there to collect it. My passport is there for proof of identity.”
C: “If you’re not there, you need to leave a letter of consent and copies of your passport and your sister in law’s passport at the house for the driver to bring back.”
M: “What? Of course this wasn’t going to be easy. But here’s the problem. I’m not there. I can’t get there before this afternoon.”
C: “Then we can’t deliver.”
M: “Are you serious right now? What else do you need from me? Do I need to wank into a cup so you also have a sperm sample?”
*At this point, my colleagues who were eavesdropping began to openly laugh at my misery.
C: “Sorry?”
M: “Nevermind. OK, does your driver carry a photocopier with him?”
C: “No.”
M: “I don’t have a photocopier either. Maybe your driver should get a scanner app on his phone.”
C: “A what?”
M: “A scanner app. For his phone. So he can scan copies of ID and stuff.”
C: “No, you have to give him copies.”
M: “You don’t listen to a word I say, do you?”
C: “Sorry?”
M: “Nevermind. Could I just scan copies and e-mail them to you?”
C: “Yes, that’s fine.”
M: “We could have led with that. I’ll send them to you now. Not your crazy South African now, now now, or just now. Canadian now.”
Epilogue
My card was delivered. And I got to write about it.
Although this was FNB, I have a sneaky feeling that any bank here would be a nightmare in a similar situation, so I guess I can’t really single them out.
But I AM willing to switch, if any of you have any suggestions.
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Wait until you need to make an insurance claim with Absa after your house was struck by lightning. You ain’t seen nothing yet! amongst other issues, I had to explain to an assessor the difference in voltage for series vs parallel battery setups, have yet for anyone from Absa to actually call me back, and still have a pile of dead electrical equipment they assure me that one day they will collect as part of the salvage clause…eish!
Oh, and to get get my PIN number for my new Diners card, I also need an SA ID nr… guess I am the first expat to renew a Diners card?
Oh, and I have been with Absa, then Standard Bank and now FNB….you are actually banking with one of the better ones
Oh man. I suslrcted as much. Customer service here is usually hilariously entertaining…a few months after you experience it!
Yikes! But sounds about right….
I have heard that ABSA is more friendly to expats. But, I’m sure they still have that South African efficiency we all come to love
Haha- it’s definitely a love/hate relationship. From an entertainment perspective though, it’s pure gold.
ABSA – when I was with them I started the renewal process for my work permit, which by Home Affairs policy as long as I applied for new work permit before the last one expired, I was still legal. Absa of course decided that the law didn’t apply to them, and as soon as the old work permit expired they froze my bank accounts without notice. Bye bye Absa.
As a born and bred South African I have banked with Absa since 1990 or thereabouts, even before it was Absa. I have fortunately never had to deal with credit card fraud, but I do have a veritable box of stories either making the case for, or against them as a bank. From being denied from buying 4 plane tickets from France to SA because they thought it was fraudulent (it wasn’t, I am currently living in France), to them couriering my new credit card to my sister without my consent, and then let her nanny sign for it (for which I was most grateful), I am currently dealing with the idea of closing all my SA bank accounts based on the fact that they just do not have facilities to hold a bank account if you don’t really live in the country, despite having a banking identity for almost 30 years.
My hubby has been very happy with Standard Bank forever and a day, with the noticeable exception that they wont send him his new credit card to France…
I mean, it wouldn’t be so bad if they were consistent- it’s just that you never know what to expect in South Africa. Which is all part of the fun. I guess.
I am unashamedly biased towards FNB (I worked there and now work at a bank in Canada and I have to tell you… FNB is streeeeeets ahead in innovation, UX and product, but perhaps sadly not always in service). Despite your shocking experience I have to tell you that you are with the best in SA. I will see who I can send this to there to, if nothing else, make them aware of and address the flaws in their process particularly for expats.
That’s great to hear I’m with the best! I’ve got to admit, my biggest problems have definitely come from the customer service end of things. Other than that, the app and general functions are pretty smooth!
I’ve never had issues in SA for the 7 years I had a credit card (Nedbank), but last week my Canadian CIBC credit card had a fraudulent charge on it. It was from the USA too. 15 min call, and got a replacement 5 days later.
Got some of that SA efficiency with Best Buy this week. Been a nightmare.
I miss the days of making only 1 phone call to get issues sorted…
Please don’t switch from FNB. Out of all the banks, they, unfortunately, are the best. Sucks that you had to jump through so many hoops – I’ve only had good experiences with them.
Do you know about somewhere, about a year and a half ago, they had some error where debit orders were processed twice for a month instead of just once? Yeah, I got hit by that. Luckily they handled it with “We know about this error, you don’t have to provide us with anything. It will be fixed.” And it was fixed.
Along with all the customer service struggles, you do get to live in an amazing country, so at least there’s that. 🙂
Agreed! I love this place. Even with the customer service, or lack thereof. It gives me something to write about!
I also Bank @ FNB. My SA wife told me to press # instead of 0 if the recorded voice asks for my ID (which is my USA Passport – too short). Pressing # It worked and I was immediately connected to a person. Might work with other automated answering systems here in SA.
Really? I was positive I tried that! Now I know for next time. Anything that brings my blood pressure down a notch or two…
This is gold, Phillip. Many thanks.
Not quite as involved, but I had a reasonably good experience with NedBank. I’m also a non-SA-citizen, and non-resident to boot (I’m a regular frequent visitor with a house and car and the like). I’ve had my NedBank account for at least 15 years.
Anyway, I wanted get their mobile app working on my phone. It just wouldn’t work due to a few glitches on the developer end (like allowing the user to guess what two letters they thought were the abbreviation for a country code). I tried to contact the bank online, but – guess what – no SA ID number, no contacting us! That’s not very polite.
Anyway, I used a generic email address instead and fired off a rather brusque note. Lo and behold, about two hours later I was called and then connected with a systems person who walked me through setting up the app. So other than the “SA ID is everything” policy, pretty good service.
I do love it when I transfer money into SA and the bank calls me to ask what it is for (they need to fill out a form for SARS, I guess). I’m always tempted to say “sex change operation” or “bribing a government official” but instead I just say “household expenses” and they make nice noises.
That South African ID requirement for automated systems has to go! It seems it’s a common issue…that nobody wants to do anything about.
Glad you got everything sorted out!
Steve,
A bit “off topic” but thought I’d share and ask for your thoughts:
I transfer $ to SA @ month for our expenses. I use Investec for currency trading which charges me only 1.2% of the current bank exchange rate (I use http://www.xe.com to monitor). I can hold the money @ Investec and earn interest. Fund transfer from the USA to Investec happens the same day. Transfer to my Bank (FNB) takes 2-3 days. The only question of purpose is asked by my Bank in the USA (I’ve always picked Family Support).
Going through Investec was much cheaper for me than Bank-to-Bank transfers. If you have a better plan, kindly let me know.
I use WorldRemit. You only fill out a form for transfers over 1000 CAD once per a calendar year. Its also only 4.00 CAD fee for any amount you transfer. Money goes straight into your bank account. WAY easier, quicker and cheaper than using bank to bank swift transfer.
Hi, I’m sorry to hear about your horrible experience. I work for FNB and would be happy to assist.
Please mail me directly
Hi Elize- I really appreciate you reaching out to me! This has been all sorted out now. It just took some effort, but I’m getting used to that!
Hi Phil. I’ve had an account with FNB and Standard Bank and I experienced problems with both of them after a while. Then I moved over to Capitec. Been with them for about 5 years and so far they have never disappointed me or my husband (he’s been with them longer). Their transaction fees are also much lower than the other banks. I would suggest you go to a Capitec Branch and ask them what options they have for your situation. They usually explain everything quite thorough. That way you can also see if you enjoy their service. My husband and I have both been very happy with their service. I must say, however, that some branches’ service is just much better than others, but overall it is quite good. Here is a link that might help: https://www.capitecbank.co.za/bankbetterlivebetter/articles/bank-accounts-for-foreign-nationals. Sorry for what you had to go through. We feel your pain.
Thanks so much Luze! I’ll definitely check them out!
I am with Nedbank and they were excellent in service and proactively picking up a fraudulent transaction on my card at 3am.
That’s great to hear! I’m still amazed the transactions on my card slipped by undetected.
FNB has a guy on Twitter – RBJacobs – just Tweet him and he gets it sorted.
That’s great to know for next time- thanks!
Haha Phil, nothing like a SA bureaucracy story to make for a great story. I feel for you! Re banks, ours was exactly the same. Our private banker was pretty awful too. We had Standard Bank. I’ve heard Investec is pretty good. I see someone else mentioned them. So maybe that’s the way to go. Hope you’re enjoying your vacation on a sandy beach right now!
I have so many stories like this…but I usually have to wait to write about them so I’ve cooled down enough to not sprinkle the posts with dozens of cuss words.
And yes- I’m for sure going to be looking into Investec. I don’t expect anything different, really, but maybe they’ll give me a whole new set of frustrations to write about!
So I’m a south African living in the UK and I had the exact same experience with one of their banks. The process to get the transactions reversed took nearly two months because of all their red tape. Believe me, as much as you think South African banks are bad, UK banks are even worse by a factor of about 10. I’m still not able to easily pay money into my credit card from my account without having to phone someone because its not considered a “linked account”.
That’s brutal! Maybe I’ve just been spoiled in Canada…
Has the initial problem been sorted out? Did they return the money of the fraudulent activities?
Yes, thankfully it was all sorted within a few days. It just took a lot more involvement from me than I would have liked!
Hello! Love your blog (just found it today)! I’m an American expat living in South Africa for years, and I about died laughing when you started talking about the South African ID number thing. I knew it was FNB immediately. I’ve been an FNB customer for like 6 years. I have the solution for you! South African ID numbers are 13 digits in length. Just enter 13 0s, or any 13 numbers really, and it’ll put you through. Then you just explain that you are an expat that uses a passport, and they don’t care :).
Also, like everyone else said, FNB is the lesser of the evils. I’ve tried to switch many times and never ended up doing it. Nedbank purports to be better, but they charge for a long list of things that FNB doesn’t charge for. I had an account for literally 2 days. They tried to charge me R350 for some fee to communicate my tax info to the US govt. They swore this was a requirement. I asked FNB about why they had never charged me for it, and they had no idea what Nedbank was talking about. I closed my account. Like 10 months later, I got a bunch of demanding emails insisting that I fill out an online form and file a W9 tax form with them. I replied saying I didn’t have an account. They insisted I did. So I sent them my closure documents. They then told me that they would report me to SARS and the IRS for refusing to report my tax info if I didn’t fill out the forms. So I did. Twice, because they “couldn’t find them” the first time I sent them in.
So in short: don’t switch, and definitely don’t switch to Nedbank.
That 13 digit trick will probably save me HOURS in the future! Thanks so much! And it’s good to confirm that I’ve got the best of the worst- switching seems like more hassle than it’s worth at this point!
Efficiency never came here to die. It was on it’s way and got stuck at the border post when it passed.