Believe it or not, I have friends. Like, a LOT. I don’t mean to brag or anything, but it’s more than Oscar Pistorius can count on all his toes. In fact, I recently wrote about going to the movies with some of them in an effort to prove that people actually choose to spend time with me (there will be an update to that post soon- Nu Metro has reached out to me and wants me to give them another […]
Vacation
Things I Love About South Africa, Post 5- Bill Harrop’s Original Balloon Safaris
In keeping with my promise to post 10 things I love about South Africa before I’m allowed to complain again, here’s number 5. One thing I’ve always wanted to do since I was a little kid was to keep my feet planted firmly on the ground, thus eliminating the possibility of plummeting to my untimely demise. For most of my life, I’ve managed to succeed in this endeavour, with the exception of a few (several) plane trips. But when my […]
Things I Love About South Africa, Post 4- Pilanesberg National Park
I while ago I promised you my next ten posts would highlight only things I love about South Africa. Because I lie only when I tell my kids where babies come from and when my wife asks if I’ve been eating healthy, I’ve managed to pump out three so far. Here’s the 4th thing I love about South Africa: Pilanesberg National Park. When I think about South Africa, the first thing I think about is rampant corruption at almost every […]
Things I Love About South Africa, Post 1- Knysna
Look, I know my last post painted a rather unflattering image of South Africa. A fair number of people were offended that I dared to point out that corruption and incompetence were commonplace here. Obviously, I know not EVERYBODY here is inept or corrupt, but I do appreciate the reminders. However, these kinds of things certainly are more prevalent in South Africa than other countries I’ve experienced. There’s no denying it. That being said, for the next ten posts, I’m […]
How to Fall Out of Love With South Africa in 30 Minutes Flat
Listen, South Africa, my love affair with you is over. I was once smitten. Head over heels. Infatuated. I tried to look past all your warts, but I mean, you REALLY seem intent on being a bad date. So how exactly did I fall out of love with the country that’s shown me wild elephants and the almighty braai? Well, let me tell you… A few weeks ago, our good friends (the Germans) asked us if we wanted to take a road […]
Zambibush-League: A Review
While Canada has many redeeming qualities, it’s not exactly world-renowned for its balmy weather. We can give you maple syrup and Celine Dion up your wazoo, but we can’t deliver year-round tanning weather. In fact, if you’ve ever wondered what it feels like to have boogers freeze in your nose or wanted to experience the delicate art of peeing in -40 degree weather without getting frostbite on your mutton dagger, I’d suggest visiting Saskatchewan in January. But even though we […]
Brand New Site, Same Old Animal Pictures
So here’s the deal- when I first started blogging, I didn’t think anybody was really going to read the crap I puked out onto the internet. I blogged simply because I don’t like people. I got sick of answering questions from people back home, and instead of spending time actually talking to anybody, I could simply refer them to my blog and be done with it. I started it on a free website and didn’t give a turd about how […]
The Best Moment of My Life
I always thought the best moment of my life would go something like this: 1) I see something awesome, like a massive shark or snake or bear or better yet, a bearsnark. 2) I pass my beer to someone 3) I make the awesome thing even awesomer, probably by riding it or something cool like that. 4) I get remembered as a legend. None of that happened. Yet. But I did see some dogs, and THAT was the coolest moment […]